Goodbye to You
by Cahhhsiiin.Rae
Summary: After a rogue demon takes Willow's life, Kennedy struggles to get over her love. She finds solace in the oddest person. Post season 7. Kennedy/Dawn. Willow/Tara. Femmeslash. Please R&R!
1. Prologue

**AN: So, this is the first story I have written under my new account.**

**I don't own Buffy or anything in the Buffyverse, except for the plot of this story, and Kennedy's last name.**

**This is the prologue to this story, so believe me, the rest of the chapters will actually be substantial. :)**

"Victim is Kennedy Carmichael, age 19, suffered extreme blows to the head and abdomen, possible internal bleeding,"

"_Willow, look out!"_

"Is she gonna be alright?"

"_Kennedy, go!"_

"I'm coming with her whether you like it or not. Now, you can either let me in, or we can waste more time as we argue about it,"

"_Willow, I won't leave you!"_

"Kennedy, stay with us,"

"_No! Willow!"_

"BP is dropping! Her pulse is sky rocketing down. Get the defibrillator working now!"

"_Willow, is that you? I saw you… I saw him kill you. Is this real?"_

"Ready? One, two, three! Clear!"

"_We're not ready for you, baby. God is not ready to have his angel back. It was my time, but not yet yours,"_

"Kennedy, come back to us!"

"_I wanna be where you are, Willow,"_

"One, two, three! Clear!"

"_I have seen your future, I have seen what is in store for you. Not yet, love, not yet…"_

"We have a pulse! Keep her stabilized, we're almost there!"

"Kennedy, you're gonna be alright,"

"_Willow…"_

_**It shall be explained. :)**_


	2. Chapter One

Kennedy opened her eyes, and all she could see were bright lights. For a moment, she believed she was in Heaven, but the sterile smell and the aches and pains all over her body pushed that idea out of her head. Her vision was hazy, and she was aware of the IV in her hand and the breathing tube in her nose. She was also aware of the voices in the room, and that they had yet to notice she had awoken. As they spoke, Kennedy recognized Buffy's strong voice talking to the sweet and innocent Dawn, Giles and Xander's low voices muttering in the corner, and Faith playing with a lighter in the chair to Kennedy's right. There was one voice she did not hear, however, and this realization made her make a soft moan in her throat that alerted them of her awakeness.

"Kennedy, you're awake!" Dawn said as she embraced her friend. The hug caught Kennedy off guard, and caused some pain, so another soft moan came out of the young woman.

"Oh, sorry," the seventeen year old girl muttered as she moved away and sat on the end of the stiff hospital bed. Kennedy looked around; everyone's faces looked happy, but fake, for their eyes showed a glistening sadness, and Xander refused to look at the injured woman on the bed at all. He was still in the corner, faced away from the group, silent and solemn, as the rest of the group converged towards the bed.

"Kennedy, we're so thankful you're— " Giles started, but he never got to finish.

"Where's Willow?" Kennedy asked, painfully sitting up in the bed for a better look at everyone. She could feel her potential Slayer strength healing her fast; she wasn't in nearly as much pain as she had been when she first woke up, but now her heart was racing at the anticipation of what the people in front of her would say. However, none of them said anything. They simply looked at the ground and stayed silent, as though trying to find the right words to say. After a few more moments of waiting, Kennedy looked to Faith. Faith was always the one who told the truth no matter how much it hurt, but even she remained quiet and looked off into the distance.

"Where is she? Why won't any of you say anything?" Kennedy demanded, tears welling in her eyes as she moved to get off the bed. Buffy forced her back; even with the strength that Willow had given them from the spell two years ago, Buffy still remained the strongest of them all. But the nineteen year old was persistent and looked at them all, waiting for her answer. It was Dawn that spoke up first.

"Kennedy, try and remember what happened," she murmured softly.

"That doesn't answer—" Kennedy started.

"Just remember. Please," Xander finally said. His voice sounded so weak and frail; it was a sound Kennedy had never heard from him. Xander wasn't particularly manly, but he was strong, and the words he said, they sounded nothing like that strong person that Kennedy had come to know as a brother.

Kennedy fell silent, and closed her eyes to concentrate, blocking out everything to focus more. She remembered waking up with Willow, looking down to find her head on Kennedy's chest, the sun streaming in, illuminated her lover's bright red hair…

* * *

"_Good morning, love," Willow yawned to Kennedy. Kennedy had been up for a little bit, right around the time the sun had streamed into the upper story bedroom of the small house. The window was on the opposite wall of the bed, and the curtains had been left open over the night, allowing the warm orange glow of the sun entrance to the bedroom. A closet was positioned to the right of the bed, with a handmade dresser next to its door. The dresser had carvings in it; trees, leaves, and flowers were beautifully etched into the surface. On the other side were a few bookcases made of similar wood. One was filled with old books, some of witchcraft, and others about demons and other such. The other had some books on it, but was mostly cluttered with different Wiccan tools such as crystals, powders, oils, and candles._

"_How long have you been up for?" Willow asked as she stretched without taking her head off of Kennedy's slowly rising and falling chest. The brunette smiled and continued to run her hand through Willow's now long hair, and then shrugged._

"_About an hour, I guess. I was watching you sleep; you looked so peaceful, I didn't wanna wake you up just yet by getting up," Kennedy replied and lifted Willow's hand to her lips. Willow smiled and cuddled closer to Kennedy's body, allowing one of her legs to escape the sheet. Kennedy marveled at Willow. She was pale, but a beautiful pale due to the fiery red hair that Willow was so known for. Her skin was smooth, flawless, and she smelled of strawberries. Her bright green eyes stared into Kennedy's soul, and her petal pink lips called to Kennedy's like a wolf that calls to the full moon._

_A soft knock came from the door, interrupting Kennedy's moment to admire her girlfriend, and was then followed by a voice._

"_It's Buffy, may I come in? Are you decent?" the voice said. Willow got up from the bed, leaving Kennedy without her girlfriend's warmth, which resulted in Kennedy giving Willow a pouting face when she turned to look back at the woman on the bed. Willow opened the door a crack, just enough for her body to be shown. She was wearing a pair of blue boxers with soap bubbles and ducks on them, and a dark blue tank top. Her hair was an extreme mess, and when Buffy was at the door, she seemed to suddenly became aware of her mishap appearance, because she ran her hand through her hair and straightened out her clothes._

"_Sorry, we just woke up. What's up?" Willow said sweetly with a small laugh. Kennedy got up from the bed, put on a pair of sweat pants, and went to the door as well, opening it further so that she could stand by Willow._

"_I'm heading into town for some groceries. I was wondering if you two wanted anything," Buffy asked curtly._

"_Would you mind picking up these things?" Willow asked, prancing across the room to the vanity mirror, grabbing a slip of paper on it, and giving it to Buffy. The Slayer scanned it over once, nodded, and then left the hallway with a half smirk that looked forced. Her footsteps clunked hard against the wooden floor and then became quieter as the disappeared down the steps. The girls heard the door open and then close behind her with a slam. She wasn't happy, but then again, why should she be? Today was the two year anniversary of the day they defeated the First, the day that she told Spike she loved him, the day that Spike had died._

"_Do you think she'll ever be okay again?" Willow asked as she closed the door again. Kennedy shrugged and held Willow in her arms._

"_It's difficult to say. She's a tough cookie. But, I see why she is so upset. I would feel the same way if I had lost you. If I ever lost you," Kennedy spoke softly as she tucked a stray piece of hair behind Willow's ear. She ran her hand down to Willow's cheek and stroked it softly, before leaning in and planting a soft and tender kiss on Willow's lips. She could feel Willow's lips form into a smile, and her arms wrap tightly around Kennedy's neck. Eventually, she pulled away with a large grin on her face._

"_I'm gonna go make breakfast. Go get in the shower, I know you wanna," Willow said as she detached herself from her girlfriend, put on her robe, and left Kennedy alone in the bedroom. She smiled, grabbed her own robe, and then went to the bathroom. As she began to undress, she caught herself in the mirror, and looked for a second. She still had the dark, wavy hair, the big brown eyes, and the high cheek bones with the light red lips. But something about her seemed different, and she realized it was her overall appearance. Willow had given her a happiness that made her almost glow. She seemed to radiate happiness with her mouth always upturned in a smile and her eyes sparkling with love._

_She got in the shower, letting the hot water massage her muscles as she began working slowly to wash her hair and body, as well as shave her legs. She did everything more delicately than usual just because she wanted to, even though it made her shower twice as long. When the water started to lose its warmth, she rinsed off whatever was left of the suds and finally stepped out into the sauna like room. After re-clothing and quick brush of her teeth, she ran the towel through her hair and finally left the bathroom, leaving the door open so the steam could dissipate._

_Then she heard a crash, a girlish scream, and thud as someone was thrown against the wall. She raced downstairs and found the kitchen abandoned, except for Xander, who was slumped against the wall. His head was bleeding from the back and some of his blood left a streak down the wall from where he had slid to the floor. Kennedy ripped her tank top bottom and wrapped it tightly around his head to try and get the bleeding to subside. Another scream was heard, this time from the living room, and Kennedy got up and went in there next. Willow and Dawn were there, fighting a demon that Kennedy had never seen nor heard of before. The living room was trashed. The big window was no more, just a bunch of glass shards on the ground. The handmade coffee table was in splinters on the floor, and other pieces of furniture lay overturned in various areas. Willow was picking up things to throw at the demon; books, lamps, cushions, anything to distract him from the weapons chest that Dawn was grabbing something from. She struck him with a mace, and he fell to the ground, but not before slashing her across the stomach. She fell against the wall, clutching her bleeding abdomen and losing her grip on the mace._

"_Is she alright?" Willow asked from Kennedy's back, exasperated from the scare of the demon. Kennedy turned around to give Willow an answer, but saw the demon behind her, about to strike._

"_**Willow, look out!" **__Kennedy shouted. Willow turned around and a barrier sprung up from nowhere to protect them. It was the first time that she had used magic of that intensity since the last battle, and her hair began to root white. Kennedy held Dawn and looked for an alternative way to defeat the demon, or at least get them to safety. The demon was scratching and throwing itself against the barrier, and Willow's strength was weakening as it began to glitch._

"_**Kennedy, go!" **__Willow shouted. Kennedy hesitated for a moment, then picked Dawn up in her arms and headed for the front door. Xander was finally conscious, and was at the living room's entrance as Kennedy was about to leave._

"_Take her and go," Kennedy ordered. Xander looked at her with confusion for a moment, until she gave him one of those looks that told him that it wasn't a request. He nodded and held out his arms for Kennedy to shift Dawn into. Once the girl was huddled against his chest, he ran out of the house, and Kennedy bolted back into the living room. She caught Willow's attention for a moment, which seemed to displease her, knowing her love was still in the house._

"_I said go, Kennedy!" the redhead shouted as she hit the demon with an energy shot._

"_**Willow, I won't leave you!" **__she cried as tears fell down her face. Willow turned to face her, about to say something angry, when the demons claws went through her stomach, and back out again. She looked at Kennedy, both of them stunned at what had just happened. Kennedy knew what had just happened, but found herself incapable of moving to help her. She felt her heart sink and her body hurt as though what had happened to Willow had happened to her tenfold. She watched as Willow fell to her knees, blood pouring out of her torso onto the floor. She took her last breath, and then fell to the ground with her cheek on the blood soaked wood, her eyes open in shock and death._

"_**No! Willow!" **__Kennedy sobbed as she watched her love fall to the ground. She stared at the demon as it walked towards her, and slowly grabbed an axe out of the open weapon's chest next to her. Tears fell from her eyes as she charged towards the creature…_

_

* * *

_

Kennedy's eyes flew open, welled with tears. She looked around at her counter parts. Their heads were down, even Faith's, who never seemed to particularly like anyone in the group.

"No, please no," Kennedy whimpered. When no one said anything, she began to almost sob, and put her hand over her mouth as tears streamed out of her eyes. Xander turned around to face her finally. She only just noticed the doctor approved bandage around his head, as well as the pain on his face. Kennedy didn't wanna believe it, didn't wanna hear it. She wanted nothing more than to have Willow next to her right then and there.

Xander walked to her bed and caught her eyes, his piercing and cold, almost empty.

"Yes, Kennedy, Willow is dead,"

**AN: So, here you go! The first official chapter. Let me know what you think, so review, invite your friends to read, etc. :)**


	3. Chapter Two

Willow remembered feeling a sharp pain in her torso. When she had looked down, the demon she had been so vehemently fighting was ripping its claws out of her stomach. She felt the blood rush from her body to the wound, and suddenly her legs felt cold and were giving out. Her knees hit the ground, her body was almost ice, and all she could see was Kennedy's pain struck face. The pain was numbing, and then everything went black.

The next thing she knew, there was a bright white light in the distance and an alluring voice calling her to it. Willow knew she was dead, but she didn't want to be. There was so much she felt like doing; so much she wanted to say first. She wanted to have one last night with Kennedy, she wanted to say goodbye to her friends, she wanted to just live for even twenty-four more hours. But the voice was just so calming, so alluring, so… familiar. It made her forget her worries and woes about her death, and she willed herself to move closer.

"Baby, come to me," the voice said. Willow took in a deep breath; she felt like she wanted to run, to sprint, to get to the voice faster. It kept calling to her and she wanted to quicken her pace, but she realized she didn't really know how. She knew she was moving, but Willow was suddenly aware that she wasn't actually moving her legs or her arms. Her mind was moving her, what she wanted herself to do; her mind would make it so.

She could hear other voices now though. Nothing so soothing and perfect as the voice telling her to move closer to the light, but even more familiar. Unlike the voice calling to her, the one that called to her heart and soul, the one she knew was familiar to her, she didn't need to think about these voices to know who they were. And they definitely didn't call to her the way the voice by the light did. The voices belonged to Buffy, Xander, and Dawn. She could feel jolts of life running through her, and she knew that her friends were trying to revive her. Because of this, Willow could pick between going towards the light and being lost forever, or going towards her friends and living again.

It suddenly seemed like the hardest decision she ever could make in life or death. If she went towards her friends, she would be with Kennedy again, hold her girl, smell her hair, all those things she wanted. She could see Xander and Buffy again, Dawn, too. But then she would have to live, she would have to work and be sick and fight demons with her friends and girlfriend every day for the rest of her life. Unlike a normal person's life, whose hardships include getting the bills paid and not ending up homeless on the street, Willow's difficulties included all of that plus keeping her friends alive and in her life. Towards the light, she would never have to worry about that again. She would be at peace.

"Willow, please, come to me," the voice said. Suddenly it all became clear to her. It was Tara; the voice, it was Tara. At that point, the decision was made for her, and she began to walk towards the light again. Her friend's voices were fading away, a silhouette could be made out in the brightness, and the light suddenly engulfed her.

"Tara?" Willow said as she walked fully into the light. It was so bright, but it didn't bother her eyes at all. Around her was… nothing. No angels with wings and halos, or even hoods and candles. No columns, no clouds, nothing. Just… white. She spun around in her spot, still not used to not being able to use her body when needed, looking around for a sign of someone, anyone, anything.

"Willow," the voice spoke. She spun around again, and saw Tara about five feet away from her. She still looked as beautiful as she had when they were dating, except she had a glow about her that she hadn't even had when she was alive. Her hair was the same length and still that mousy brown color with the perfect shine in it. Her eyes sparkled, and she was still donning that sheepish grin that she used to give Willow in the early days of their relationship. Her clothes were the same ones she had died in, except that they were no longer blood stained and ripped.

"Tara…" Willow said, and willed herself to be closer to her. As soon as her lips were within reach of Tara's, she leaned forward and pressed them to hers. She kissed Tara with fervor, and was pleasantly pleased when she kissed her in the same fashion. It was odd; Willow couldn't really feel anything, she couldn't feel her limbs move or anything her body was doing, but she could feel Tara. She could feel Tara's hair between her fingers, her warmth against her body, Tara's lips kissing her. Most importantly, Willow could feel the emptiness that had never been completely fixed fill up with her love for this particular girl.

Willow couldn't ever deny it; she had loved Kennedy, she really had. She knew that Tara would have wanted her to move on, wouldn't have wanted her to wallow in her sadness and loneliness. Eventually, Willow had moved on enough to find happiness in another woman. However, nothing Kennedy could have ever done could completely fill the void that she felt in her heart and soul.

One of the best things about Kennedy, though, was that she understood. One night, on Tara's birthday, Willow ventured out of the house. She could feel her body wanting to move as she had lain next to Kennedy in bed for the night. Her limbs were restless, her heart thumping, mind racing, keeping her awake as the night droned on. So, when Kennedy had rolled over in her sleep, Willow slipped quietly out from under the covers, donned her jacket and sandals, and left the house.

She had no idea where she was going; the only thing on her mind was Tara. She walked far enough to where the house began disappearing behind her as her feet carried her over hills of pastures. Eventually, Willow stopped on a far hill, which was tall enough to see the house in the distance. The wind was warm and mellow, but still noticeable. She could feel Tara's arms in the wind, wrapping around her and holding her close to an invisible warmness. The feeling of completion she felt for the invisible Tara made her lose sense of time and alertness. It startled her when she felt a human hand touch her shoulder from behind her. The wind and warmness left her alone as she whirled around to see a startled and worried Kennedy.

"Willow, what are you doing out here?" Kennedy asked her. Willow said nothing as a large gust of wind came her way, making her shiver. Kennedy removed her jacket and placed it around Willow's shoulders with a soft smile. Her lover's perfume and natural smell wafted from the fabric, filling her nose with the scent of citrus and orchids.

"It's her birthday. I felt restless, like she was calling me out here." Willow murmured, dropping her head in shame. She had a feeling that this would hurt Kennedy's feelings, knowing that her girlfriend was thinking about her dead love. But Kennedy acted in an unexpected way by lifting her head up and kissing her softly.

"Will, I don't expect you to just forget about her. She was a big part of your life and that is that way it will always be. I'm just hoping that, with time, one day I can fill that void." Kennedy said. Willow felt slightly angry, wanting to tell Kennedy that she could never fill replace Tara or any emptiness that she had left, but she knew that she was only trying to help. She let her lips form a small smile and extended her hand.

"Come on, let's go back inside," Willow said, and she left the feeling and Tara on the hill as she walked home with Kennedy.

Now, as she stood in front of the girl that had been without for a little over three years, she felt horrible, like a cheater almost. Willow wanted to form tears, but apparently you didn't cry when you were dead. However, Tara just kept smiling and then grabbed Willow's hand. She could feel the soft warm skin against her, but couldn't feel her own hand.

"Are you… are you real?" Willow finally managed to speak out. A small giggle escaped Tara's lips and she kissed Willow again, this time longer and softer. When she pulled away, leaving her a little stunned, she took Willow's hand and placed it on her own chest. Willow could feel something resembling a heartbeat, but it wasn't actually beating. It felt like a burning rather, but not an actual fire.

"What you feel is raw emotion. It's burning because it's love's fire, and it burns for you. No one else could feel that except for the object of the fire." Tara explained. Willow closed her eyes and willed her hand to press a little harder on Tara's chest. She could feel the fire in her chest, burning violently for her, and she could feel the warmth spread into her own body and make her fill up with happiness. Tara then placed her own hand on Willow's chest, making her gentle green eyes open. Tara was smiling and caught Willow's gaze.

"You burn for me, too," Tara said to her. Her hand dropped from Willow's chest to one of her hands. Her face took a sort of seriousness for a second as she looked hard at Willow.

"Are you ready to really spend forever with me?" Tara said to her. Willow looked at Tara's perfect face for a minute and then nodded. A smile spread across her lover's face, but then left as quickly as it came.

"Willow," Tara said, pointing to the darkness away from the light. Willow hadn't noticed it before, but then again, maybe it was because no one was standing in it. Even though it was almost pitch black dark, she could see a person standing in the abyss. Willow walked a bit closer, holding onto Tara's hand until her arm was fully extended and then their hands separated. As she stepped closer, she could make out the figure; it was Kennedy.

"It's not her time, is it Tara?" Willow asked, looking back at her woman. She shook her head with a sad face, and stepped close to Willow.

"Only one of you was supposed to die and you have made the decision for it to be you." Tara spoke. Willow closed her eyes for a second, and then looked to Tara. She nodded her head and Willow knew what she needed to do. She walked closer to the dark, stopping where it merged with the light so that Kennedy could make out at least a part of her.

"If she tries to come, you have the power to push her back. Use it," Tara said from behind her. Willow turned again to face Tara; how could she be okay with just sending Kennedy away from this wonderful place? Kennedy deserved it just as much as she did, so why would she have to continue living life, which seemed so much harder in comparison to wherever Willow's afterlife had placed her, and not be here. It didn't seem right, it didn't seem fair. Kennedy would feel exactly what Willow had felt when Tara had died, the empty hole in her chest where her heart died with her lover.

"How can I just send her back, Tara?" Willow asked. Tara took Willow's hand then, and closed her eyes. For a second, the redhead stood there, deeply confused, until images raced across her mind. All were of Kennedy and all of them showed her future and the potential it had. All the visions were happy, showing promise of Kennedy's pain subsiding. When the visions ended and Tara opened her eyes, Willow had the strength and know-how to send Kennedy back to her mortal life.

"**Willow, is that you? I saw you… I saw him kill you. Is this real?" **Kennedy spoke softly as Willow turned back towards the dark. She took a step closer, and Willow put up her hand to stop her from moving further towards the light.

"Yes, Kennedy, it's me. You need to go back." Willow said with a sort of command.

"But, Willow, why?" Kennedy asked, her voice sounding frail and almost like a child's.

"**We're not ready for you, baby. God is not ready to have his angel back. It was my time, but not yet yours." **Willow said, trying to sound stronger than she actually felt. Saying goodbye to Kennedy was harder than she thought, but she knew that once it was over, Tara would be there with her… forever.

"**I wanna be where you are, Willow," **she whispered, her voice sounding shaky, almost as though she was trying to keep the fact that she wanted to cry a secret.

"**I have seen your future. I have seen what is in store for you. Not yet, love, not yet…" **Willow told her, and then put her hand up towards Kennedy. She couldn't hear Kennedy's voice anymore, because she knew her smooth words would make Willow give in. She murmured a soft goodbye, closed her eyes, and willed Kennedy back to Earth. As soon as Kennedy had been there, when Willow opened her eyes, her figure was gone.

* * *

"What? No, it can't be possible." Kennedy said as their words sank in.

"We did everything we could. We almost had her back, but then she left us again." Xander told her.

"What about a spell? Can't you do a spell to bring her back?" Kennedy asked through sobs and tears. Buffy looked at her finally, anger in her eyes, but not anger at Kennedy.

"I am supposed to be buried in the ground right now, a spell is what brought me back. It ripped me from Heaven. Now that I am alive, it's alright, but I won't, I couldn't do that to Willow." Buffy said through gritted teeth, and a single tear fell from her eyes, which was quickly wiped away.

"We can't bring her back, Kennedy. Unfortunately, Willow's death was of natural causes, and not mystical as Buffy's was," Giles interceded.

"I don't give a damn!" Kennedy replied, slamming her fist on the table.

"Kennedy, when Buffy was killed, she was killed by mystical energy, and therefore was able to come back. However, Willow died by a natural cause; she bled out. No magic can reverse that. If we were to bring her back, it would not be the same Willow." Giles said again, swallowing and pausing every now and again to control himself so that he didn't cry, too. Kennedy laid all the way back in her bed and turned over, facing away from everyone. She could hear them start to leave, and tears fell steadily from her eyes.

"You know," Faith spoke up. "You're not the only one who lost Willow. So remember that in case you decide to push us all away." Then the door shut, and they were gone, leaving Kennedy to her thoughts and tears.

**AN: Ta da! I hope you like. :) Anyways, read, review, enjoy. And please, oh please, tell people to come read. I work really hard on my stories, and I want more than one person to read them, you know?**

**_~ Carson Rae_**


	4. Chapter Three

The following days after Willow's death were dreadful. Kennedy got out of the hospital the next day, due to the fact that the doctors could not find a single reason as to why she should stay. She was banged up pretty badly; she should have been in the hospital for weeks. However, after a physical evaluation by five different doctors and a brain scan, she was clear to go home. All her cuts were beginning to scar and her bones on their way to becoming fully repaired. It was a miracle, they all said, that she even lived, but even more so that she was able to recover so rapidly.

No one had been home since the incident. When the cars pulled up to the driveway, the house was still in the same shape they had all left it in the day before. People from the local forensics lab were taking down the yellow tape and clearing their gear, believing they had sufficient enough evidence to find Willow's killer. Oh, they wouldn't find it, but they could certainly try.

One by one the gang got out of the two cars they were piled into and entered the home. If one could even call it a home anymore. The house was destroyed. The entire front wall that faced the hills and sunset was completely demolished, the tables overturned, vases and lamps broken on the floor, the weapons chest open. There were splinters of wood everywhere, broken glass; it would take forever to clean up. Buffy had shooed the forensic team away from the house as fast as possible that they hadn't had time to clean up. So as Kennedy walked in the front door and looked into the living room where Willow had died, the big pool of blood that had been the cause of her death was still there, as well as some of her own and the streak that Xander had left in the kitchen from his head. Kennedy felt as though someone had reached into her body and was squeezing her heart and she felt tears well up. Without a word and shrugging away from Dawn's reassuring hand on her shoulder, she booked it up the stairs and slammed her and Willow's bedroom door shut.

The rest of them stood looking at the same scene, unable to move, think, or speak. Buffy had that glazed over look in her eyes, looking as if she was welling up. She closed them and then cleared her throat.

"We should, um, really get this cleaned up," she managed to say, her voice sounding much more weak and frail than she had wanted it to. She was the Slayer, one of many now, but the original one out of them all. She was supposed to be strong and stoic, but she couldn't bring herself to care enough to act that way. Her best friend in the whole world was gone. Willow had stood by her through everything. When she was messed up from the Master all the way to when Spike had died. In the course of two years, the two people she had cared about most had perished and there was nothing she could do. She couldn't bring them back, she couldn't make it better, she could do nothing. Buffy had to stand by as everyone was in pain and do… nothing. The thought killed her. The thought of Willow being dead killed her. The thought of Spike being dead killed her….

"Buffy?" she heard Giles ask. She had been standing in the bathroom with towels in her hand for about five minutes, lost in her thoughts, and tears had been falling down her cheeks. She turned her head to Giles, who also looked as though he was going to break down. Buffy looked down at the towels and sniffled.

"I was just… just… thinking about… Willow," she said and then she buried her head in the towels and began to sob. She felt her knees began to get weak and she began to drop to the floor. As her knees hit the ground, she felt arms around her and opened her eyes for a moment to see that Giles had caught her and was now holding her. She could feel him shaking from crying as well. They just sat there on the bathroom floor, holding each other, sobbing, and letting it hit them that Willow was gone.

After what seemed like an eternity, Giles pulled away and put his hands on her shoulders.

"Look at me, Buffy," he said to her. She looked at him through tear filled eyes, trying to choke back hyperventilating.

"We have to be strong, alright? We have to. Otherwise this whole family is going to fall apart, Buffy," he said. She wiped her eyes, and then nodded weakly. He got up to his feet and then pulled her up, too. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and when she was satisfied that she looked presentable, she nodded to him and they walked downstairs together with the towels.

Kennedy was in her and Willow's room. She had been in there all day, and now the sun was low on the horizon and night was setting in. Streaks of pink and purple were in the sky and it was beautiful, something Kennedy usually would have admired. But not tonight, not ever again it seemed. Kennedy picked up a stuffed dog from their bed; she had bought it for Willow for Valentine's Day. She sat on the bed, running her fingers across the stuffed animal. She sighed, she had no more tears left to cry, but a righteous headache from all the crying she had done earlier in the day. Nothing seemed to matter to her. She hadn't showered since yesterday morning, and she was still wearing the bloodied and tattered clothes that she had entered the hospital in, refusing to take the ones they offered her. Kennedy hadn't eaten in a few days either and it was only now that she was beginning to feel faintly hungry, but she wasn't ready to leave the room just yet.

Then she heard a faint knock on her door. Kennedy opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it. She had no words really.

"Kennedy, it's me, Dawn," the voice on the other side said. Kennedy sighed, she couldn't take it out on Dawn, she wouldn't. That wouldn't be right. She slowly got up and opened the door for Dawn and then went to sit on the bed again.

"I just came to see how you were doing," Dawn said as she stepped in and closed the door softly. Kennedy shrugged, still finding herself not able to speak. Dawn sat down across from her, and put a hand on hers.

"Honey, you might wanna go shower, before any cuts you have get infected. And maybe change clothes and eat something," Dawn said. Kennedy looked up and shrugged again. Dawn sighed and then reached around her neck to undo a chain. She pulled up a necklace from under her shirt that Kennedy couldn't recall ever seeing.

"I think that you might need this a little bit more than I do now," Dawn said, fastening the necklace around Kennedy's neck. Kennedy put her hand over the beautiful stone. It was a kind of blackish color, smooth but rock shaped. It was held on by silver top with a thick chain that seemed indestructible. Kennedy looked at Dawn, wondering what it was.

"It's an Apache tear. Willow made it for me when my mom died. She said that it helps keep you strong and grounded, and helps with grief and comforting. She also put a few charms on it, to make it special. She put a charm that someone will always be watching over you no matter what. I figured you'd need it more than I do right about now, especially since, you know, she made it," Dawn said. Kennedy's eyes began to water and a tear fell down her cheek. Dawn reached up and wiped it away with her thumb.

"I know she'd want you to have it," Dawn finished and Kennedy nodded and wiped away her tears.

"Thank you," she whispered out. Dawn nodded a "you're welcome" and then stood up.

"Why don't you shower, make sure those cuts don't get infected, and change clothes. Then you can come downstairs and eat if you're hungry. Everyone is still cleaning up, so I'm making my special, spaghetti," Dawn said. She reached forward and tucked a strand of Kennedy's hair behind her ear, and then stood up and walked to the door.

"Please come eat. It will help you sleep tonight," Dawn said and then she exited the room and closed the door softly again. Kennedy sighed and went to the mirror. The Apache tear was beautiful, and it was warm from Dawn's skin. She put her hand on it; it was like she could feel Willow's presence and warmth spilling into her body. It made her feel more alive, more like she was here, a little more energetic. Kennedy put the necklace under her shirt and then went to the bathroom. Dawn was right in Kennedy needing a shower. Her hair was a mess and she had dirt and some dried blood on her face. Her clothes were ripped, dirty, and bloody. Sighing once again, she took them off and threw them in the trashcan, and then turned the water on to cold and stepped in. She felt freezing, but it didn't matter. It kept her awake, alert, on her toes. Kennedy assumed that the shower would be short and sweet, but it wasn't. Despite the coldness of the water, she took her time washing everything, as well as thinking. Kennedy would never be caught off guard again, ever. She would never let another demon hurt her friends. She would take precaution, be cautious, careful, awake, and alert, always.

Once the water was running out of coldness and turning warm, Kennedy shut it off and got out. She saw the clothes that Willow had planned to wear for the day hung off to the side; a green top and a brown skirt. Wrapping the towel around her, she took them off the hanger and smelled them. They smelled like strawberries, like Willow. They were warm, too, having been hanging over the heater for a while. Kennedy decided to wear these clothes, since they were hers anyways. After slipping them on, she dried her hair and then walked down the stairs.

When she entered, everyone was still cleaning. Xander and Giles were busy repairing the front window. It wouldn't be done till tomorrow, but they had the frame up and tomorrow they could put in the dry wall. The kitchen wall had been bleached of the blood; Kennedy could smell the harshness of it, but Buffy was still working the bleach into the wood floor where Willow's blood had been. All the glass and splinters were cleaned up, and the broken lamps and table parts were thrown outside in front of the broken wall.

And then Kennedy remembered something. When they had walked in, the house was in the same shape that they had left it in, but there was no demon. No demon blood, no demon body, no nothing that even suggested a demon. She hadn't killed it, but she had badly wounded it. There should have been blood, but there was none.

"Buffy?" Kennedy whispered. The whole house stopped and came towards her, still keeping their distance. Buffy stood up and came over to her, taking the bloodied gloves off her hands and wrapping them in the towel.

"Yes?" Buffy said. Kennedy walked into the living room, looking around for any signs of the demon.

"What happened after I blacked out?" Kennedy asked, trying to remember.

"Well, I saw you battling it, and you chopped it pretty good in the arm, and then it picked you up and threw you against the wall. You blacked out and then it kept beating up on you. Hence all the wounds you suffered. I came in and it ran out the back-" Buffy replied.

"So, it ran out? And then you took me to the hospital?" Kennedy said, her voice wavering. They could tell something was the matter with her, because her voice seemed… angry.

"Yes, that's right," Buffy said.

"Did you go after it?" Kennedy asked.

"Well, no, I-" Buffy started.

"What? You're the Slayer! You're telling me that you didn't kill it? You didn't slay the demon that killed Willow? That the thing that killed my baby is still out there?"

**Sorry it took so long guys. I've been busy and I wasn't sure how to keep going. But I got it. :) Review please!**


	5. Chapter Four

"Kennedy, think about this for one moment!" Buffy shouted as she pounded on the door. Kennedy was upstairs in the room again, rummaging through her things. She found her Slayer gear as she called it; a pair of brown leather pants with a matching brown leather jacket, a black tank top and black boots. In each of her boots she had a knife and around her neck a large cross. Her hair was up in a high ponytail and to finish it, she still wore the necklace that Dawn had given her. Just as she was about to leave the room, Kennedy picked up a crossbow from the closet and a bundle of arrows.

"There's nothing to think about," Kennedy said as she pushed past Buffy and walked down the stairs. She went to the coffee table and swept everything off of it, not even bothering to see what or who the items belonged to. She laid a map of the area on the table and then took an amethyst on a chain from her pocket. She then wrapped Willow's shirt around it and began to dangle it over the map.

"What are you doing?" Buffy asked as the gang followed her into the room.

"I'm trying to locate the demon. Willow showed me this a while ago. She said it's a little iffy if you're not a witch, but it's the best place to start," Kennedy said. The amethyst began to make a sort of ringing noise and it spun around more violently across the map.

"Kennedy, you're not going after the demon," Buffy said just as the crystal hit the map. Kennedy looked down; it was near the cliffs by the ocean a few miles away.

"Yes, I am," Kennedy said as she went to the chest and began to weapon herself up. She put a few stakes in a bag and grabbed a mace. As she turned around, Buffy grabbed her shoulders and shook her.

"Listen to me! You can't go out there, okay? It's not safe! You don't know anything about this demon, how to kill it or what it's here for. It killed Willow and it almost killed you!" she said, tears forming in her eyes.

"No, you listen to me. A demon killed Willow. I kill demons. You're the Slayer, you're not slaying. Ergo, I'm gonna go find it, and I'm gonna kill it, since someone else has to do your job. Now, get your hands off of me or else," Kennedy said. Her eyes were almost pure black and she was grinding her teeth so much that her jaw was set in her face.

"Or what?" Buffy asked. Kennedy dropped the mace, bag, and crossbow from her hand. She then gave a sort of small smirk and then, before it could even register in Buffy's brain, Kennedy was grabbing Buffy by the arm, throwing her a few feet in the air, and then kicking her straight in the stomach into the opposite wall. Buffy crashed into the wall, which then broke the spackle and some of the dry wall.

"Or that," Kennedy said as she picked up her equipment and turned to the door. Xander and Giles ran across the room to help Buffy up and Dawn watched with sad eyes as Kennedy walked out the front door.

As Kennedy was walking towards the ocean, across the pastures, the house becoming smaller behind her, she heard a voice call her name.

"Kennedy, what are you doing?" she heard the voice say. It was barely audible, almost a whisper, except more wispy than that. She spun around, looking back towards the house. The light from the house illuminated the shadows across the lawn, and she counted five. All five people that were supposed to be in that house were there. So where was the voice coming from?

"Who's there? Come on out, otherwise there will be hell to pay if I find you," Kennedy said, looking everywhere around her. She closed her eyes and listened, but heard nothing except the faint sound of the wind in the trees and possibly animals across the ground. After a few moments, she concluded that it was just her imagination, and she turned back towards the ocean. But when she did, she froze in her spot. Standing in front of her was a sight that she wasn't sure she was actually seeing. It was Willow.

**Sorry this chapter was kinda short guys. But it was just a good segway into the next chapter, which might be longer. The thing with the map, it's called Scrying, and it's actually something I took from the show Charmed, which is pretty legit too. So yeah, review please! :)**


	6. Author's Note

Dear Readers,

Hi guys! I just wanted to take a few moments to share some things with you.

I WILL be continuing this story, your support has made it very easy to want to. I used to just do these to pass time and because they were fun, but all your support and want to read what I have written truly is an inspiration to me.

However. There's always a however isn't there?

I am a college student with a part time job. The college program I am aiming to get into is very competitive and my grades and GPA are a big determining factor in getting into the program and the length of time I have to wait to take most of my classes. So it's very important that I get no less than an A in my General Education Requirements. Anyone who is in college will be much more understanding than those who are not.

But I promise, I will finish this story. And the more support I have the more I might take some time to write it.

So I'll make a deal with you.

Ready? Okay.

If YOU, my loyal readers, can get more people to subscribe to this story, it may motivate me to continue writing sooner rather than later. And the more people you get, the more I'll write. Deal? Good.

Now... GO!

Love,

(aka Carson Rae - That's my for shizzle name :))


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